Who are you?

Sometimes my voice irritates me. I'm not talking about the words I say, but more the words I think and write. It's strange to me how much I think and then filter out before I actually write something. Then after all that consideration, I'm frustrated with what has come out and I wonder if I should have just kept it all as thoughts. Obviously I'm referring to my latest post, but I'm also thinking in general about the things I choose to say and write. I like to think that I choose my words wisely and think consciously about what I am going to say before I say it, yet sometimes the garble that eventually comes out doesn't fit together nearly as well as all the thoughts I had. Other times I frantically record my thoughts and the voice that turns up is one that seems more like me, yet artificial in some respects. I find little cliches and ways of speaking that I don't really think in my head. I guess I just picked them up from actually conversing with people. So I have this strange limbo between my real voice that is a lot more like my thoughts and annoys me, and I have this social voice that fits in and sometimes feels more natural but is mostly unnatural. Now I wonder which voice I'm using right now. Hm.